Riding 2-up with mortality...

[adventurelounger]

I sort of inadvertently hijacked another thread about "S" vs "T" modes, so thought I'd post this here. It's something I think about a lot, certainly every time I swing a leg over my S10. I'm sure others do, too.

My (late) father was a doctor. I grew up around an ER. Motorcycles were considered irredeemable death machines in my household, as my Dad often saw the unfortunate human upshot of stupidity, daring, recklessness, or dumb bad luck.

Nevertheless, I was two-wheel obsessed from the start, craving the Rupp Toad minibikes and Honda Trail CT70's I'd see—and salivate over—in the pages of Boy's Life magazine. Seventies motoporn advertising for kids.

It took until college for me to answer the call and buy myself an entry-level drug, a 1984 Honda Aero 70 scooter. I freaking loved it, despite the fact that it was hardly the ideal vehicle for winters in Burlington, VT.

Later in life, I bought a Vespa...then a couple of BMWs...and now the SuperT. I ride MOSTLY ATGATT, but do cheat around town, although I always wear a full face helmet and riding gloves (I fall down in the boot department). When I actually go "riding-riding," it's armor everywhere. White full face helmet. Moto boots. The full kit.

Here's the thing: I have 3 middle/high school-aged kids and a wonderful wife, who ABHORS my riding habit. Because she'd abhor something happening to me. I'd also hate to have a life-altering accident, too.

And if my teenaged, driving-age son wanted to get a bike now (or any time before he was into his 30s and in touch with the idea of risk), I'd kill him or disown him, as hypocritical as that may sound.

At the same time, my wife knows how profoundly I love riding, the deep satisfaction and balance and joy it gives me. I blog about it. Dream about. Talk about it. And absolutely obviously love it.

Still, I feel like I'm riding 2 up with mortality on the back seat, which I've finally come to think is a healthy and self-preserving thing. I ride while narrating to myself and thinking about what COULD go wrong, so I can anticipate and avoid it. In fact, I try to do as much of my riding at times and in places as far away from cars and traffic as I can, so I'm the one controlling my own destiny. Obviously, you can't avoid everything. But I try hard to limit and mitigate risk.

I've settled on this (which FrontRangeRider mentioned):

I'm 50. Besides my family (and several other passions like skiing, cycling, and books), riding is a true love of mine. The list of medical maladies that might await my otherwise healthy, middle-aged ass is long and joyless.

So I'm going to seize the joy, ride with care, and be deeply grateful.

Mortality, please hold on tightly, and lean with me. I want you to get home safe, too.

 

[Tippo]

It's nice to have a reason to get home safe. My father had at least on bad motorcycle crash before I was born and my mother hated motorcycles. I owned many motorcycles before she died but she never knew.

I carefully chose a wife who did not hate motorcycles I always tell her where I am going and when I expect to return. If I am going to be late, I give a call. I will purchase an In Reach for my next tour. It's easy to be out of cell range in my area so i plan carefully. I have had a long history of on-time arrivals from rides and backcountry ski adventures so I have earned her trust. I never want my wife to wonder where I am or when I will return. When I come in the door I say "safe and sound". She says "you're so good". We have 36 years together this December.

Jeff

 

[ejy712]

I gave up riding when I started my family. Wasn't too hard, I would have been commuting in Washington DC. Not much joy in that. When I was 55 a friend of the family got a 1983 Honda Nighthawk. The local cycle shop wouldn't tune it because it had carburetors. My son volunteered as he worked on the (motorcycle) engine in the SAE race car in college. He did a fine job. But our friend was out of town when he finished. He called me and asked me to test drive it because he thought I had retained my motorcycle endorsement. I had, and did, and was that a mistake (maybe)! All the joy of riding came back in one short ride. I was hooked again.

I'm 65 now. I've been riding a lot in the last 10 years. 52,000 miles on my 2012 S10 which I bought new in Nov 2011.

I have a Scala on my helmet. My wife can chat with me when we're two up. And she can call me whenever she wants when I'm off by myself. I call her whenever I see something interesting. This works to keep her fears at bay. We've had a good thing for 42 years, and I want to keep it going.

I try to be as safe as I can recognizing the risks of motorcycling. I study books and internet forums dedicated to motorcycle safety. I practice things like quick stops and swerving. I limit my rides to daylight hours, and in low traffic areas when possible, which is most of the time. I'm completely ATGATT. I'm a trained MSF instructor. I also worked most of my career with the DuPont company which takes safety extremely seriously. So far, so good. It's a process.

That said an entranced cell phone user could do me in.

Bottom line: I really love riding. I find the reward well worth the risk, and will continue riding until that is no longer true...

 

[kmac]

Sissy...Pin it to WIN it.

But seriously, I am also 50 but my dad answered my call to all things 2 wheeled when I was 6 in 1970.
My wife is a long time RN in a hospital setting and like your dad detest "donor cycles".
I also have a kid {only 1 and she is now 20}.
I went the other way than you though. I am WELL insured so that my wife and daughter will at least have some financial help if some thing should happen to me. I do not ride "stupid", at least by my standards, I am very aware of my surroundings and assume every single not only does not see me, but WILL try to hit me. Other than that, I ride hammer down.

If it ain't fun and exciting, why do it?
There will always be some danger to everything. People have died sitting on their couch watching TV. In reality, sitting on your couch is FAR more dangerous than riding since obesity and the ensuing heart disease and diabetes are the number 1 killers in this country.

Sonny Bono and Natasha Richardson both died snow skiing. I have had WAY more friends die in car accidents than motorcycle crashes.

I took a different approach with my kid. She had her own dirt bike since she was 6 and is one hell of a dirt bike rider. She has also ridden hundreds of miles pillion with me on the street.
I work hard to show her the dangers, teach her the skills, and she has had a few scares on her own. She respects bikes and will not likely ride on the street on her own.

In the end, we ALL die at some point, and I would way rather die twisting the grip off of the thing than some drawn out slow cancerous death.
Maybe it is just me though ::021::

 

[wfopete]

Take a MSF course. Practice the drills. Gain confidence. Find out what you and your bikes limits are doing drills.

But remember there are no guarantees in life...well other then death and taxes.

I work at a bike shop. It frightening to see what comes through the doors that passes for a "experienced rider" and a "road worthy bike". I'm surprised there are not more deaths.

 

[bruised]

I find that my extra caution while on 2 wheels carries over into driving caged saved me more than a couple times by never assuming anyone sees me

 

[Checkswrecks]

If you have 3 kids of the ages you mention, at least one will follow in your steps and insist on riding. Better have a plan.


My ex was/is an RN and HATED everything motorcycles. (Reason #998 that she is my ex. LOL) She about KILLED me and my son when he surprised us both by saying that he WAS going to learn to ride. He was already a college student at the time and I had as a 2nd bike at the time a beater KLR. We figured that he would start with me in a parking lot and then some gravel roads.


When he was ready, I knew of a motor officer who is also a MSF instructor, and he went over the whole class with Tim and another young man. I also had Tim do some ambulance ride-alongs and for a while I thought he might become a fire fighter. Even then, I kept the bike keys and we rode together for a long time before he was allowed to go solo.


At the end of about 6 months, he took the old KLR and it was his college set of wheels for a year, till we bought a WeeStrom in need of work.

 

[pnelson]

It's all about lowering the percentages. There are some things you can't control and some you can. So do your best with the factors you can control.

* Educate yourself by taking advanced courses and reading good books. See below.
* Eliminate the two biggest risk factors, alcohol and speed. (Almost 1/2 of single motorcycle accidents involve one of these.)
* Getting hit by a car - 56% of motorcycle deaths - So don't get hit.
* Car hits motorcycle from the front 78% of the time.

These last two mean that if you can deal with these and don't drink and go too fast, you'll remove yourself from the largest percentage of accidents. So, be seen and expect cagers to turn in front of you. Studies show that high-vis helmets and jackets help but also that a little wiggle moving the bike in the lane can help a car see you. When they don't see you though, the only thing on your side is time. Going too fast means you don't time to react and/or stop. Even time to slow down and lessen the impact can help. Keeping your fingers on the front brake gives you time not wasted in having to move them into position. Moderating your speed into intersections and over rises gives you time to react. Planing ahead and looking for escape routes and practicing high-speed stops are all things you can do to lower the odds you'll be hit.

The next biggest cause of accidents is "failure to negotiate." In other words, going too fast into a turn and loosing it. There are books written on this (see below) but if you just slow down going in and brake before you enter the turn, you'll have won half the battle.

This is an interesting thread. There are tons of videos on Youtube on this stuff. Maybe we should post a few and let folks comment.

I just read a good book that I'd recommend to anyone thinking about wanting to ride safely: http://amzn.to/1rCwFMO

 

[adventurelounger]

I have that book on my night table. It contains excellent information and advice; if I had to make only one minor criticism of it, it's that it can (in a few parts) be a little over-technical and wonky. But I've learned and applied many skills directly from it.

What I do think is valuable about this thread is that, as PNelson so clearly points out, a HUGE—perhaps the greatest—aspect of riding safely and mitigating risk comes from mindset and rider behavior.

Which, for me at least, is helped by being actively mindful about what I'm doing when I ride:

"Car up, dude...they won't see you...cover brakes...is she gonna turn? No...no....no...ok, cool, made it past another one. But she definitely had that glazed look, dude. Good for slowing down. K, here's another one...I can see the Starbucks cup from 200 yards...oh, boy...cover..."

It may sound morbid or weird, but I also think about and literally visualize disaster, especially when I find myself getting a little too, um, enthusiastic. Not to be a buzz kill. but to act like a sort of mental "governor" and "get home safe" device.

Which brings me to one of the things that fascinates me most about riding (and I don't mean to over-intellectualize this): what's so freeing and liberating and fun about it is also what exacerbates risk: speed (which has undeniable pleasure), lean, accelerating, braking...

In all of these joys (and yes, skills), YOU are in absolute control of how far you push it. On a bike, you're like an advanced, two-handed, two-footed, one-assed risk machine...much more so than when you're driving and protected by a cage.

So the single greatest safety/risk-mitigation device is your brain, your conscience, your demeanor, and your self-control.

I know most postings and threads tend towards "how do I flash the ECU to get more power" or "why can't they make it easier to turn off the freaking ABS." I'm not criticizing or judging that. I get it. This is supposed to be fun.

But I also think discussing how you turn on your own squishy grey helmet-clad ABS—Advanced Brain System—is worthwhile.

It's the technology that can save your ass so you can keep enjoying it. And could save you from dying twice, once at the hands of your own stupidity or forgetfulness, and then again at the hands of your enraged "I-KNEW-IT-and-I'm-gonna-wring-your-NECK!" wife. Thanks for the comments and thoughtfulness and links...

 

[bruised]

Going to check that book out although I've been riding almost 40 years still have room to learn and improve

 

[rem]

Wow !! What a great thread. You guys are ok, I don't care what everyone says about you. ::012:: ::008:: And I agree with pnelson, Proficient Motorcycling is an awesome book. Once I started reading it, I found it to be almost like a good novel. There is a sequel … More Proficient Motorcycling. More of the same … just as appropriate and readable. Get it … read it. Anyway, thanks, adventurelounger, for starting it. And thanks to everyone else for the intelligent and heartfelt comments. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it.


I've had one nasty accident that laid me up for a few months. It was a legitimate accident, and I'm pretty sure I know exactly how it happened, although I still don't remember a lot of it. It was just me and some sheep. When I'm in town or around other vehicles, I just expect them to do something stupid …. I am rarely disappointed, but at least I AM expecting it. This has been very helpful. My wife is far more concerned with my getting bored and old and fat than she is with my having an accident. She encourages me to ride. I guess that's why I've kept her for 45 years. Well, OK, I guess we all know who has kept whom. Thanks, Dear. R :-* Let's be careful out there. R

 

[Checkswrecks]

Wow !! What a great thread. You guys are ok, I don't care what everyone says about you. ::012:: ::008:: And I agree with pnelson, Proficient Motorcycling is an awesome book. Once I started reading it, I found it to be almost like a good novel. There is a sequel … More Proficient Motorcycling. More of the same … just as appropriate and readable. Get it … read it. Anyway, thanks, adventurelounger, for starting it. And thanks to everyone else for the intelligent and heartfelt comments. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it.


I've had one nasty accident that laid me up for a few months. It was a legitimate accident, and I'm pretty sure I know exactly how it happened, although I still don't remember a lot of it. It was just me and some sheep. When I'm in town or around other vehicles, I just expect them to do something stupid …. I am rarely disappointed, but at least I AM expecting it. This has been very helpful. My wife is far more concerned with my getting bored and old and fat than she is with my having an accident. She encourages me to ride. I guess that's why I've kept her for 45 years. Well, OK, I guess we all know who has kept whom. Thanks, Dear. R :-* Let's be careful out there. R

Ahem - Rem -


About you and them sheep.


This is the motorcycle forum. There are plenty of other forums with like-minded people for those kinky snowed-in "long winter" stories. Like you keep saying, be safe up there!

 

[rem]

Ahem - Rem -


About you and them sheep.


This is the motorcycle forum. There are plenty of other forums with like-minded people for those kinky snowed-in "long winter" stories. Like you keep saying, be safe up there!

I take your point, Cw …. that didn't come out exactly the way I meant it to. How about "horny road obstructions" ?? No, that isn't much better. Ovid Obstructions. There you go. Bye for now. R ::003::

 

[TXTenere]

Excellent thread, and a great reminder to be safe out there. I think that as time passes without issues, it's human nature to get complacent; before we know it, bad habits have developed that lead us to not being as safe as we could be.

Just today I took my bike out for a 180 mile ride and because of this thread, I reminded myself to be aware of drivers going slow along a road. When I came up on one going slow, rather than get annoyed and want to pass them, I stayed back and waited, and before too long, they made an no-signal turn into a hidden driveway. Had I gone to pass them there, they almost certainly wouldn't have seen me, and there would have been a collision. Also because of this thread, while on a road today that is FILLED with hidden driveways (130+ I've counted, on a nine mile stretch), I reminded myself to take it easy and be ready for a car to come out of a hidden driveway. Thirty seconds later, one came out. I was ready and braked and there was no issue.

For me anyhow, the few reminders above are exactly the kinds of things that I find myself getting complacent with. "I've traveled this road so many times, know every curve; I can push it just a bit more." You can, until one day, it bites you.

Riding is all about risk management. Manage your risks well, and be safe everyone.

 

[pnelson]

 

[Dirt_Dad]

It's the all to frequent reminders of mortality that reinforce my decision to ride. Whenever I hear of an untimely dead due to a freak accident I always say to myself, "that's why I ride."

Death will eventually catch all of us, and none of us know when it is coming. You might as well do the activities that make you happy. Learn to do them safely. Understand the risks and take steps to mitigate them. Then enjoy life.

Your time will come. It cannot be avoided. Avoiding an activity that brings you satisfaction may not give you a single extra day on this earth. It will guarantee that you missed out on something you would have brought you joy.

 

[TXTenere]

It's the all to frequent reminders of mortality that reinforce my decision to ride. Whenever I hear of an untimely dead due to a freak accident I always say to myself, "that's why I ride."

Death will eventually catch all of us, and none of us know when it is coming. You might as well do the activities that make you happy. Learn to do them safely. Understand the risks and take steps to mitigate them. Then enjoy life.

Your time will come. It cannot be avoided. Avoiding an activity that brings you satisfaction may not give you a single extra day on this earth. It will guarantee that you missed out on something you would have brought you joy.

Very well said. I'd hate to decide to quit riding, only to be diagnosed with cancer (or ... Fill in anything else) in a year, and die of that ... All the while, I likely would have been safely riding. Instead, I'd have spent the last year of my life wishing I was riding.

 

[rotortech71]

I have that book on my night table. It contains excellent information and advice; if I had to make only one minor criticism of it, it's that it can (in a few parts) be a little over-technical and wonky. But I've learned and applied many skills directly from it.

What I do think is valuable about this thread is that, as PNelson so clearly points out, a HUGE—perhaps the greatest—aspect of riding safely and mitigating risk comes from mindset and rider behavior.

Which, for me at least, is helped by being actively mindful about what I'm doing when I ride:

"Car up, dude...they won't see you...cover brakes...is she gonna turn? No...no....no...ok, cool, made it past another one. But she definitely had that glazed look, dude. Good for slowing down. K, here's another one...I can see the Starbucks cup from 200 yards...oh, boy...cover..."

It may sound morbid or weird, but I also think about and literally visualize disaster, especially when I find myself getting a little too, um, enthusiastic. Not to be a buzz kill. but to act like a sort of mental "governor" and "get home safe" device.

Which brings me to one of the things that fascinates me most about riding (and I don't mean to over-intellectualize this): what's so freeing and liberating and fun about it is also what exacerbates risk: speed (which has undeniable pleasure), lean, accelerating, braking...

In all of these joys (and yes, skills), YOU are in absolute control of how far you push it. On a bike, you're like an advanced, two-handed, two-footed, one-assed risk machine...much more so than when you're driving and protected by a cage.

So the single greatest safety/risk-mitigation device is your brain, your conscience, your demeanor, and your self-control.

I know most postings and threads tend towards "how do I flash the ECU to get more power" or "why can't they make it easier to turn off the freaking ABS." I'm not criticizing or judging that. I get it. This is supposed to be fun.

But I also think discussing how you turn on your own squishy grey helmet-clad ABS—Advanced Brain System—is worthwhile.

It's the technology that can save your ass so you can keep enjoying it. And could save you from dying twice, once at the hands of your own stupidity or forgetfulness, and then again at the hands of your enraged "I-KNEW-IT-and-I'm-gonna-wring-your-NECK!" wife. Thanks for the comments and thoughtfulness and links...

+100 Everything said here is as if I had written it myself.

 

[rotortech71]

It's the all to frequent reminders of mortality that reinforce my decision to ride. Whenever I hear of an untimely dead due to a freak accident I always say to myself, "that's why I ride."

Death will eventually catch all of us, and none of us know when it is coming. You might as well do the activities that make you happy. Learn to do them safely. Understand the risks and take steps to mitigate them. Then enjoy life.

Your time will come. It cannot be avoided. Avoiding an activity that brings you satisfaction may not give you a single extra day on this earth. It will guarantee that you missed out on something you would have brought you joy.

Absolutely!!! A perfect, and unfortunate example of this;

My father in law is 71. He has been retired for about 9 years. He does nothing, has no hobbies, and reads or watches movies most of the day. He is however in good shape, due to the fact that he and my mother in law are work out fanatics. They eat well and keep themselves in very good shape. But they have always lived their lives believing they have to remove themselves from any activity that may cause them harm. You would never find them skiing, going into the ocean, biking, motorcycling, ect. Those are things you simply do not do, because there is the possibility of injury. They can't believe that I would subject myself to something so dangerous as motorcycling, mountaineering, snowboarding, snorkeling in the ocean, ect.

My point is, this week my father in law begins radiation treatment. He just found out that he has prostate cancer, with tumors forming in the area. It's a reminder that you can't close yourself in a cave and fully protect yourself. Whether it's out on a motorcycle, rock climbing, or sitting on your couch, death will catch us all. You might as well get out, and enjoy the relatively short time you are here.

 

[Derekj]

To each their own ..... If I got on a bike and thought about the risk and consequences of riding each time , I would have quit years ago. Like others I started riding at age 5 and have been riding each year since for 45 years.
When I am on the road my natural common sense kicks in and I drive cautiously and have changed somewhat to cater for the texting revolution . I am always aware of my surroundings and ride accordingly. When the conditions allow, I break all speeding rules and ride as hard as I can and push myself as I get my "fix" of adrenalin. I do this at no risk to others. Out in the country, sometimes I slow down enough to inhale nature and absorb its energy. Lately, I have fallen prey to the ever changing technology both in our bikes and accessories. I too have music and comms which allow for companionship on the longer rides. I have 3 great kids and my Son got his first bike at 8 and absolutely loves riding. My wife rides with me sometimes and I am sure that will change after all the kids fly the coupe. In summary, my life has been enriched by the existence of all my bikes as it has brought peace and clear thought to balance out the frustrations of everyday life.